Thursday, September 30, 2004

Late night TV

Why is there nothing interesting on the telly? You would think that between free to air AND Foxtel I would be able to find something to watch! But no, instead all i have to choose from is crap and alright stuff that I have already seen 100 times before. I swear that the episode of Law & Slaughter: SVU was on just yesterday, and last week, and twice the week before that. And (please forgive me for admitting this) there is only so many times you can watch JLo smack the crap out of her shitty husband before it gets boring. So here I am, fighting against late night TV enhanced boredom by crapping on about it in my blog.

To all of you who have ever been asked for your number by some dodgy in a bar, pub, club or local library, and for those who are just not into giving out their number to the general public, the Rejection Line is here to spare you the trouble or rejecting your unwanted admirers, suitors and stalkers. This is the ultimate form of delegation!! Imagine being able to delegate the responsibility of rejecting unwanted hangers on to a voice recording! How fantastic!! Never again will you have to screen your calls to avoid that idiot from Saturday night! The Rejection Line number is 0419 317 446 (for Australian callers only). What a great idea!

Please let me know if you use the rejection line number with any success, or if you are unfortunate enough to have the rejection line number given to you. Any rejection line storys that you may have will be greatly appreciated... I can always do with a laugh!

Anywho, I'm too bored to really do much at all now, so I'm off!

Too good!

Posting order sorted.


I Rock!!!

God I am good!!!

After 3 hours of fighting with the computer and pretending that I could possibly know HTML (maybe one day), I have managed to put a new comments section on this blog!!!! (Please see previous postings regarding how much I suck with computer stuff for proof that this is a massive feat!)
As Bear said, "Hurrah, I out smarted the computer!"

My new SquawkBox comments thingo (I use very technical terminology) is easier for everyone to use. Much better than the one provided here on blogspot.

My next challenge will be to get a hit counter on the page... but I don't know if my stress levels will handle more HTML (tears were shed over the comments fiasco), so maybe I will leave it til later...

Then again, I am known as a glutton for punishment!

Once again, if anyone knows how to change the order of my postings so that the most recent ones are shown first, please let me know.

I rock!!!


I have moved!

New blog, new address, new technical probs for me to try and work out... (If anyone can tell me how to change the settings so that the new posts are at the top of the page and not the bottom, please let me know.

This is all too confusing for me!!!

After my cry yesterday on xanga about how technologically incompetent I am, I have now been forced to move my blog to blog spot, which admittedly does seem to be a little easier to use. I moved from xanga because people had to be members to leave comments while here at blogspot anyone can leave a comment. It makes things much easier for you guys (but a bit more work for me)!

Anyway... Now that's all explained I'm going to go and bumble around with the comments section to see if it can be made easier to use.
This is all too much for me!


Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Moved from Xanga - 30/9/04

Addendum: I just managed to work out how to change the colours of my page and put backgrounds in and stuff!! AND I put a web counter on!!!!


I am so smart! I am so smart! S. M. R. T!

I mean... S. M. A. R. T!

Moved from Xanga - 30/9/04

Very much loving this spare time to write crap!!! God uni holidays are good... if only they were longer.

I must ask that the simplicity of my weblog be excused. Until recently I could barely turn my computer on, let alone navigate my way through the simple wizard that xanga uses to create your basic blog! Seeing as this website is my latest novelty, it stands to reason that I have been having a little play around with the settings (as much as I can). The reason that I chose xanga to host my blog was because it all seemed quite simple and easy to use for someone like me who is technologically illiterate. In a moment of sheer stupidity I decided to play with something called xanga skins, which you use to customise your page. I was really pleased when the site said that it had a little tutorial to show you how to use the skins option. I entered the tutorial and almost cried when on the first page it stated that one required a "working knowledge of HTML" in order to use the skin thing. I don't even have a not working knowledge of HTML. I don't know what HTML stands for and every time I'm required to use it, or even talk about it, I call my computer expert to do it for me. For me, finding out that HTML is required is equatable with finding a spider in the house... I scream, run away and get someone else to fix the problem for me.

I wonder why, seeing as I am of a generation that has been raised with computers, mobile phones and various other pieces of technology, I have been burdened (or could that be blessed?) with technological illiteracy. I can barely "drive" a Nokia 5110 mobile and I have been known to cry with frustration when my old boss wanted me to attach a few files to an e-mail that I was sending. Even my microwave has been known to get the better of me, more than once in fact!
But most of all, the only thing I have ever really wanted to know about a computer is how well it will fly out of an 11th storey window in the middle of Sydney city. To all those people I worked with who many times discouraged me from ever really finding out, I would like to say thanks. According to a very nice computer engineer that I met the other Saturday night, a computer will fly better out an 11th storey window if you tie one of the useless idiots from the IT department to it to add a bit more weight.

By the way, if the very nice computer engineer that I met the other Saturday night ever reads this: Had a great time. Call me.

Could technological illiteracy be genetic? Or is it just that my brain doesn't cope with these things as well as some others? We may never know... but one thing's for sure, technological illiteracy most certainly is a laughing matter.


Moved from Xanga - 30/9/04

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Well, this is my first post! And it seems to me that now the ball is rolling there will be no stopping it!!! A monster has been unleashed... and all because someone told me I was funny! There's no stopping me now... all you can do is blame Steve!

Lately I have been thinking about the protocols of screwing. The other day I was informed, by a guy that I had shtooped regularly for a couple of months, that I had attained "ex" status. When I mentioned the fact that we hadn't really "dated" in the kind of conventional manner that would regularly grant one the status of being an ex following a break up, I was informed that none the less I was included in his list of exes.

This got me thinking about the protocols of the dating / shtooping world, and what criteria one must fill in order to become an ex. Are there categories of exes? Ex-girlfriend / boyfriend? Ex-shtoop? Ex-we-dated-for-three-days-and-then-screwed-on-a-casual-basis-for-three-months? Where do we draw the line when bestowing the title of ex? Do we just use the term ex because it is shorter (and less revealing) than saying "this guy that I used to screw"?

No firm conclusions have been made on this front, and if you have any ideas please let me know. All my posts are open for discussion via the comments option or the guest book and any worthy quotes, rants, responses or ramblings that I may find in there may (with adequate acknowledgement,of course) make their way into the posts.

That's all folks.

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Me Posted by Hello