Thursday, October 28, 2004

The best time to move out of home is when your parents don't love you anymore...

Thanks Merrick!

I found out yesterday that my boyfriend's parents have read my blog! I haven't even met these poor people yet!! Imagine the impression they must have of me!!! Despite that I'd like to say a big "Hi!" to Mr and Mrs M-, and thank you for reading my blog! I look forward to meeting you one day! :o)

By the way... anyone that reads my blog regularly and doesn't leave me a comment (Redfox, I'm talking to you!) is in my bad books today! I look so unpopular with no comments left for me! So everyone who reads this, be ye friend or foe, please click on the little comment box when you visit and leave me a little note to make me feel loved! (That includes you Mr and Mrs M-!)

And today I need lots of loving. I have had a complete shitter of a day today. One of my "best friends" has told me to go fuck myself and uninvited me from her wedding celebrations. Today she starts spouting some crap about me disliking her fiance and not supporting her marriage and me not understanding that her priorities have changed now that she is engaged.

All of this was news to me! She appears to have pulled it out of her arse. I have always adored her fiance. He is a lovely man who has brought happiness to the life of a young woman who, for many years, has experience much more pain than pleasure. I have always, and will always like him for that. As for getting married, I would never stand in the way of her happiness. It is obvious to me that this man is what makes her happy, so what else can I be but happy for her?! I know that her priorities have changed now. They have been changed ever since she met her fiance. I haven't pushed to try and take up her time, in fact I have hardly seen her in the last 3 months! But when she cancelled on me at the last minute the other week, after I had cancelled a shift at work to travel to Cronulla to see her, with no apology, I said something about it. Obviously it's ok for her to treat me however she wants, while for me to stand up for myself appears to be well out of line.

This is a girl who is more like my sister than my sisters are. A girl for whom I would drag myself over broken glass. I can't count the number of times over the years that we have cried on each others shoulders, helped each other pick up the pieces, planned revenge on ex's, bummed out infront of videos, got drunk, tucked each other into bed and looked after each other when we were sick. And obviously it all means nothing to her. She is now pretending that she doesn't know who I am.

Over the years I have seen her give this treatment to other people... I just never thought that I would be on the receiving end of it....

It breaks my heart.

"When you feel that nobody loves you, nobody cares for you and everyone is ignoring you,
you should start asking yourself...
am I a c***?"

I've thought about this a fair bit today... and honestly, this time, I don't think it's me.

Does anyone want to runaway with me? It's all just too much today...


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